Not what you expected, leaving him behind,
surely not becoming blind
Didn't expect this black black world
filling your eyes without a word
to explain why, how, when,
to explain why it was different back then.
Didn't expect not catching any feeling
and staying for hours, looking at the ceiling,
almost looking for an answer you know it does not exist.
Looking for an answer, almost wishing you don't exist.
Looking everywhere, searching for a clue
to why, left him behind, you're just not you.
Trying to remember why did you run away,
As if you didn't know you had no chance to stay.
As if you didn't know there's a reason why you ran away.
And you could've asked for some advice,
but you didn't 'cause you can't do any right.
But you didn't 'cause it's easier this way.
But you didn't and you break more everyday.
And you think everyday as if it could change something,
and the more you know you can't the more you feel like a thing.
And you don't even want him, it doesn't make any sense.
You can't understand and keep feeling so dense.
You don't know what you want,
do you just miss that feeling?
You don't know what you want,
you can only hope you're healing.